The more I sober up, the more sick I am/realize how weird dancing around a wine bottle was
We basically counted to 3 and then dumped each other.
I was about to go down on her and her dong flopped out and hit me in the chin. This may have a Nam like post-traumatic-stress-disorder effect on me.
I don't really want to write this paper. It's the last one of the semester - I need to savor the feeling of procrastination.
Threw up 3 times on the lawn mower and then proceeded to crash it into a tree root and break it.
I don't know what happened to get you in this mentality. This time last year your were ass up on a hotel bathroom counter getting licked by a stranger.
As i lay in bed, clutching my face, i'm starting to believe your dick in my eye story.
Dude, I had no choice. I was defending my genitals.
I'm hurting so bad I actially had to wait for my mini wheats to get soggy before I could eat them..
It will be like a scavenger hunt.. only we're looking for places to have sex.
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
cmon you know I'm perfectly capable of something that ridiculous 100% sober
You need to stop showing people the things i drunk-text to you... i have a reputation to uphold here
not only did he puke in his mouth and hold it.. He also sneezed while doing this
Just realized I've spent more nights sleeping on bathroom floors the last two weeks than in my own bed. It's time to reevaluate my life.
Randomize
