hey can i play with your boom stick tonite? I'll let you shoot the love of jesus in my face.
come over
What kind of friend are you? You don't even blackout anymore.
Grown men dancing to Spice Girls and a girl wearing one shoe. I belong here
dude, I just walked in on your little brother changing clothes...I'm ashamed to say I noticed, but that kid has as MASSIVE cock...
Yeah...we all know. it's the elephant in the room at family gatherings.
that is a frighteningly accurate metaphor for it.
DO NOT FUCK HIM ON MY BEAN BAG CHAIR
im not gonna bother asking u how it was... we could hear u through the walls
I'll bring the barf blanket just in case.
Gave the kid in the wheelchair at the bus stop a beer and proceede to lift him on the bus. porch drinking brings out the best in everyone
Aside from the fact that there's a penis in my mouth, that's a pretty good picture of me
It's ok for me to have his baby but I can't be his friend on fb. Wth is wrong with this
I'll just tell her I'm here with you picking out a buttplug for her to say "I'm sorry".
FYI If I die in my sleep it is because I drank a bottle of coke from 1986. I needed a mixer
I just spent 12 consecutive hours in the same outfit and none of it was pajamas. If that's not personal growth, I don't know what is.
Dinner at 5, shrooms at 10.
He chose me to be his birthday sex..theres a lot of pressure riding on this bang
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