SO stoned. Sitting in just a thong in front of a fan. NO work for a WEEK! Life is good :)
Prostitute standing on the corner thrusting at cars as they drive by. New marketing strategy?
using smirnoff bottles as a pillow actually isnt as uncomfortable as you would think
Honestly, It follows the same rules as Cock Roulette.
Why does She think it's her duty to welcome in freshman through the welcome mat that is her vagina
I drunk-cried for all conjoined twins everywhere the other day.
I am the kind of drunk to where i can still drive a golf cart
Btw, do you want me to fix this with a box of wine and a chick flick or is this more of a 'lets head to the strip club' problem? I'm just trying to analyze the emotional depth of the situation.
IT'S A FUCKING GIANT POKEBALL MAD OUT OF TINY ROSES
She is the Michael Jordan of blowjobs. Unfortunately, her baby sister is the Michael Jordan of baseball of blowjobs. It does not run in the family.
thanks for piggy backing me around for the rest of the night when I got too drunk to stand.
Yes I am wallowing. There is a significant lack of cookie dough
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed
Theres just something about today that says lets get drunk, dont you think?
Its safe now. But... Nobody should sleep on my bed tonight.
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