Lets date for the summer
what?
Dont love me in September.
tonight, alcohol would be proud of us
she's bipolar. she literally has TWO facebook pages. one for each personality. this. bitch. is. crazy.
But the ghost of his schlong past haunts you
I just told the joker that my vagina is the bat cave and he needs to infiltrate it.
Oh and apparently something happened that was related to "THIS IS SPARTA" but no one will tell me what I did.
So I'm going to blame my boobs hurting on that.
Judging by his bulge. This guy is going home with me. Who doesn't want a dick that looks like it used to be a pillar in Rome.
SO DRUNK
PUKED IN DRIVEWAY
TELL PARENTS SORRY
But of course I'm in. After all, what fun would the holidays be without trying to find the perfect gift to impress someone you've never met, but need the approval of??
Is Facebook telling the truth about your nipples?!
Someone explain to me why I woke up to find a stolen shopping cart in my room...
Please wake up and help me figure out how I woke up on the floor with my head under the couch
Well Jon got a DUI sleeping in the back seat so I thought the trunk was safer. BUT WHO CARES WHY JUSE PLEASE COME LET ME OUT!
i'm not sure you can trust me in a car with 20 dozen donuts
Holy. Shit. I just remembered all the lapdances....
Randomize
