i just saw my boxers from 2 days ago stuck in a tree 4 miles from my house
I love the "adulterer" look on you. It's hot.
Its part of my fall instant classic line.
All i learned in high school was how to sell drugs
Of course it's dangerous. Why else would they hire us after we failed the drug test?
She bent the beer can with her tongue. I'm scared of what she'll do to me
We just took turns doing keg stands. 27 is way too old for this. Out of 5 of us, our best time was 9 seconds.
For u too. Could be years before u have a finger in ur ass
it was like vegas minus all of the penis and death threats
Hate to say it and even though I definitely have a biased opinion but I'm surprised your not, sleeping with anyone else. Good personality, charisma and amazing in the sack.
Feel free to use me as a reference.
buying a tattoo gun on ebay just sounded like a good idea at the time idk man
At first I was a little embarrassed for sharting, but then i realized it was a bachelor party, and I went balls to the wall
His constant posting of "inspirational" Taylor Swift quotes over the past 3 days has me a little worried. It's like, holy shit dude, you're almost 30.
New war strategy! The ex-girlfriend of my ex-girlfriend is now my twice a week booty call!
So if you wanna come get your pants you can. But you have to come in your boxers. Rules are rules!
the good news is I finally used my captain america waffle maker to make captain america waffles
Randomize
