Riddle me this. What had unbelievable sex, and finally understands the meaning that things come better in pairs?
I hate you
Saying she let herself go implies she was actually holding on
Sitting in the library lobby in the middle of exam week. Drunk. Dressed as santas slutty helper. Waiting for the student shuttle service. People are clapping for me as they walk by. Tell me how this isnt college
Mustard is by no means a replacement for yellow wall paint
I woke up in the penthouse and did lines off the to of the fireplace. This is not real.
The bouncer said he wanted to but BBQ sauce on my legs. That Mystic tan has already paid for itself.
The stripper from Delilahs paid the desk clerk to find out my room #. Either Im doin something very right or she's doing it worng.
Fair warning: We've transformed the living room into a giant tent.
Who is Katie and why do we have her birthday cake?
i should probably stop thinking with my vagina, and start using that $70, 000 education i can't afford. what the fuck.
I didn't ask to see his penis, it was an ambush. Impressive though
Also the McRib is back. Lets get high, dress like cowboys, and eat some McRibs.
Sorry I couldn't reference you in my facebook quote. I will redirect any likes and comments straight to my blowjob efforts this week.
Also, I had mind-blowing sex on a pool table
My eye was non-stop itchy for like an hour... I thought burying my face in your ass caught up with me
Randomize
