dude all my bootycalls are going to Eclipse tonight... Do I really want it that bad?
Just got my cast off. My occupational therapist wants me to self-gratify. My clit is about to have an awesome weekend...
while we were dancing I voluntarily took my bra off and hung it around his neck as a necklace. 2011 lets go
so why are there three stressed gay men and a bowl of vomit in the smoke room?
After throwing up, the toothpaste tasted so good. Thank you for not letting me eat it.
Year anniversary in a month. Think I'll just give him a COME ON MY FACE FREE card. I'm both broke and shameless.
Wtf. I just got invited to a threeway bj session in the bathroom at boiler. Lmao
A surprise thumb up the ass and I'm wide awake. She was right, no need for caffine pills I could fight ninjas now.
So we get back to the hotel room and Tom strips off his clothes... His first sexual act as my fiance? Helicopter dick. I gave him a high five.
I think our maternal nature is best focused on grown ass men and cats.
So anyway, I'm just floating along life with my vibrator and low expectations.
I felt like I needed to shower with a Mr. Clean Magic Eraser.
Such a big mess for such a small penis
Dammit. the window insulation sheets are too small for my windows. Yet again I am disappointed by size
Chasing shots with airborne.. Gonna get rid of my sickness and my soberness.
Randomize