I need a man. I think Im going to put myself on Craigs list since they caught the killer and all.
Do it and if you add naked pictures youll get an instant reply
i feel like my life has become an afroman song and idk whether i should be sad about that or not
So I'm about to go to his house and have "I'm really sorry for cheating on you last night" sex
You guys seriously fuck to bieber? That's embarrassing...
Church boner. Awkwardddd
Naturally, I just peed all over the floor. Two guys in front of me looked at me, but i just shrugged. They won't remember either.
I obviously couldn't but this on your fbook wall. I would get judge. I would willingly get tbagged by him. You can quote me on that.
Found plan b box covered with blood. In kitchen sick. Pickle jar is empty. Wtf happened?
You know how hard it is to jerk off in a bathtub with a dog staring at you?
got a blowjob in the bar bathroom, got arrested for public intoxication, and found a big bag of weed on the ground on my walk home from the station. my friday night could have been a movie
If me saying "come f***k me now" is talking, then yes.
Even though I'm gonna be a felon I'm having fun for time being.
Whenever a guy asks me why I like weird sex stuff, I just answer, "Catholic School".
My father has a definite type: blonde, busty, 18-22. It was awkward when I was in college, but now I'm over it. I play wingman for him and he buys me expensive purses for the assistance in getting him hooked up with girls younger than me. Win-win.
Told a guy at the bar I was hurricane evacuees with no place to stay. Just woke up at his place. God bless Florence
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