K, im just throwing this out there, i am not making out with any of his friends... Especially the cross eyed one.
great time with ya sorry i wasn't one of the three guys you wanted to stay with
i hate when i ask a girl what she's being for halloween and the first word isn't "slutty"
You were so drunk that you were trying to take pictures of a MILF at the park so you could send them to Adam, but you didn't want to "seem creepy," so you used taking pictures of her son as a cover. Needless to say, cops were called.
So me and friend just finished Eiffel towering this girl and sounds great in theory but after the high five has commenced its just a weird threesome especially when you make eye contact with your buddy during the session
i don't know how the hand towel got involved, but i peed all over it
Well on a positive note, crystal light now comes in margarita flavor
She fuckin peed on me
Stay golden ponyboy
My head feels like a nest made of hair and cum
I can only only sleep there on nights I orgasm cause he snores so loud and if he leaves me hanging one more time ill probably cut off his dick from lack of sleep and frustration
What, I can't laugh at my sister being driven crazy by Facebook randomly assigning chat significance to the guy she lost her virginity to?
Today one of my patients offered me pot brownies. Medical school worth it. Living the dream.
I haven't had sex since the Vanilla Ice concert
Please don't have sex ever again just so you can say that forever.
You hit your head and proceeded to fall in the floor, curl up in my lap and make me rock you like a small infant. I was beginning to worry until you started to sing "Rock me momma like a wagon wheel".
I didn't have anyone to cheers so I tapped my beer on your fish tank... a little too hard
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