found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
my new years resolutions dont apply when im drunk
He just kept telling me how to do certain things. It was like I was fucking my sex ed teacher
I feel like we're taking advantage of the fact that our R.A has cerebal palsey.
while you've been gone this has kinda turned into some sort of fivesome-type thing. just thought i should warn you for when you get back
His best friend walked in while we were banging, turned on the light, yelled BURN, grabbed his computer to play the Thunderstruck drinking game, turned off the light and left.
Going to the hospital for stitches on my balls. Mom walked in on me manscaping with an electric razor. Tell NOBODY.
Good news: he out-ran the campus police. Bad news: they were chasing him toward the REAL police.
I've started making all these amazing things...like bananas rolled in doritos..bandritos.
Apparently after taking body shots off of a guy i haven't seen since 1st grade, i ate a stick of butter, showed everyone my tampon string, and fell off the boat. my uggs belong to the sea now
It's 11am on 4/20 and I'm already in urgent care.
When did I go from having sugar daddies to being one? And does it count as a tax write off?
His idea of role playing was him wearing the halloween mitt romney mask while I gave him head
I've had three separate encounters with cops in the last 9 hours.... In two different states
do you remember showing me a picture of your husbands penis last night?
yea! the mushroom one. i would only show you.
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