my vagina has a 5:00 shadow
I'm at the house listening to vengaboys alone. Please come home.
His facebook says he is a fan of "underwater handjobs"
He said he wanted to see my room, not my womb. It's a common mistake.
Well, at least he doesn't refer to you as his associate. his mattress associate
judging from the number of limes and box of kosher salt on the counter therell be 8.5 gallons of tequila drunk this weekend.
sounds about right
I CAN'T DO THIS MUCH FABULOUS BEFORE LUNCHTIME
Shitshow foam night was such a success
My period started right as he was entering, which really helped me sell the "I've never done this before" bit.
I'm not going to say what I did. You're smart enough to figure it out. But I did it. And you owe me 20$
Rome wasn't built in a day - my bedroom skills weren't obtained in some boring monogamous relationship. Same thing. Right?
WHAT A DUMBASS ugh I'm so glad he looks like a middle aged dad now
I say this out of love and friendship. Eat ice cream not the d.
Sometimes i wish my vagina automatically turned itself off when i'm legally drunk.
whatever, tonight I’ll be getting my ass eaten by an aussie so we good
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