I just know... :) goodntight
Whoops, meant "goodnight", but the other is true too.
Don't judge me. Haven't eaten all day so I'm in my room sticking my finger in peanut butter, then jam, then my mouth.
Highlight of my evening, pile of books falling onto me in front of people
you kept screaming i cant feel my vagina, it kinda killed the mood.
like the only thing i remember is bringing a piece of toast to the bar...
I wish you could see how much hot sauce and broken glass are in our apartment right now.
I'm stoned and just shared 4 cookies with this chicks dog
They're raisins though so they're healthy. No worries.
I thought it was a myth but I have just reached the age of sitting on my balls. Not a fan.
A guy in the dance floor is raising the roof with an axe in hand. I love Halloween.
I'm eating captain crunch out of a cup half full of beer so idk
I got dressed on his front steps, peed on his neighbors lawn, then did a shoeless walk of shame home at 5am...
I just masturbated to the thought of him straight up talking to me. to us having a conversation. What the hell.
My cat just tried to lay on my stomach while I was masturbating. And I let her because I am so starved for affection.
My kid made a secret wish that you have a baby... Make good choices today!
You said "I feel like a koala bear. Do you ever just feel like a koala bear?" This is your brain on drugs.
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