What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
Well, they emptied out the keg by the third kegstand for America.
I've carried my liver for over 24 years. If it can't carry me for the next 24 hours than it deserves to be damaged.
Well since its impossible for me to swallow a pill this big I'm making wine slushies out of them
i have an important question...can you drink in jail?
I have to date her we need a place to stay for tailgating
She called to say her plane was running late and i had 30minutes to get to the airport for bathroom sex
maybe if I avoid him long enough we could skip the talking part of "we need to talk"
He said the pain stops when I get my shit together and stop being a drugged out alcoholic mess. Could have just said no.
Got stiff armed by the garbage man on the back of the truck...I just wanted to ride one block dude
Mashed potatoes are always the fuckin answer ok.
Just cropdusted a little kid that wouldn't get out of my way in Kroger. Welcome to the real world bitch.
I'm sitting in my car avoiding a customer. Apparently the new year hasn't affected my attitude nor work ethic
Leaving the puke on the ceiling as a reminder.
Laying in bed naked is fun. I now see why guys love boobs... They're sooo bouncy! This long distance relationship is really killing my sex life.
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