You called him your tasty little crouton. Which actually wasn't the weirdest part.
You think posting ushers "let it burn" video on his fb page is in bad taste? haha
Life gets in the way of sexy Saturday sometimes
Dude, he's legal now. You could not pry me from his dick with the jaws of life.
So the contents found in my winter coats this year: coat 1, condom and 10$. Coat 2, condom and 75$ check. Coat 3, 2.05$ and a sunflower seed.
Obviously coat 3 had the best time since you used the condom and all of the money
THE CEO RESPONDED TO THE MEMO WITH HIS "UNICORN" EMAIL ADDRESS AND NOW HE'S APOLOGIZING TO EVERYONE FOR USING HIS PERSONAL EMAIL AT WORK.
I just remember lots of butts and something about ranch dressing.
I asked to see his balls for medical purposes.
That moment when a stripper is the one that makes the two of you have to define the status of your relationship...
PS- My flight is being emergency landed bc someone smuggled cats on the plane.
THE FASTEST WAY TO MY HEART IS THROUGH FAMILY SIZED BAGS OF GENERIC BRAND CHEESE BALLS
It's not a funeral, it's a celebration of life. Going commando AND braless is really just honoring him!
what could you have possibly accomplished by watching 6 hours of a mythbusters marathon
well, i added sex in a wind tunnel to my bucket list
So, just how hungover are you?
Not at all, surprisingly.
That has to be your X-Men power.
also, my mom just called to make sure the dick tattoo on your arm was fake..
Randomize
