i wonder what barack obama's brickbreaker high score is...
she gave him a mild concussion from throwing him against the wall in an attempt to dance with him. gotta love monday nights at the sandbar.
Just ate cheeseit crumbs off the floor. i feel like Kirstie Alley.
Yeah not really sure what I said but I remember "douchebag" and "fuck your own face"
To a 70 year old lady?!
Just bought all my wine for the weekend with a check at 11am. I'm almost judging myself.
why the fuck are my pubes caked with bread crumbs?
The other. Cat spoke to me and left. This shit is laced
The first cat might save me but they are taking out masks
Alls I remember is making out with that chick.
Nope that was a dude
I made a side by side comparison of her Facebook pic and the chick on the anti meth billboards. Plus a ven diagram showing mostly shared physical attributes. I sent u the PowerPoint. You were sufficiently warned.
Awee what are you going to name your new dog?
What dog?
well I've taken an Uber to my weed dealers twice in the past 2 weeks so it's going well since I sold my car
I'm slowly getting to where I don't hate people anymore.
Never mind. Some random dude just walked past me and asked if I was having fun. I snarled at him. I might still kinda hate people.
If this gives you any indication of my current state, I stopped at Meijer after work and bought funyuns, pregnancy tests and chocolate.
lets face it, we have a liquor cabinet with a designated chocolate shelf
Kay so its 9 am whose dumbass is gunna act sober to buy pizza rolls
Dude you promised
Randomize
