I wanna do crazy things to you in a tent
fuckk wrong person
.. who was that for? a girlscout?
Sooo sorry about that. And crying. And comparing my life to a duck
We had break up sex twice. He said one was cause he had to say goodbye to both tits.
I lost my phone so I put sticky notes all over my roommates body asking her to wake me up at 7:00 AM.
my wrists were so small for the handcuffs, i could slip them off and hand the tow truck driver my keys....
Operation liquormelon is in full effect. We may die tonight.
We don't have a lot of plans besides weed and cake
he's drinking beer at home in his underwear tonight and if you want to come over the dresscode is underwear only. And you have to bring beer.
Nothing like moscato in your sinuses tobmake your night complete
I think it may of been me pulling down my pants is why she walked away.
Go big or go home. i snuck in two beers in my bra. im here to win.
Pro tip: if you can avoid puking on your carpet, do so. Cleaning it up is absolutely no fun at all.
Well, he kept asking me if I was going to murder him once we got upstairs. It sort of killed the mood.
I think I’ve been affected by his dad mustache. I wanna ride it.
He's asking how tall I am he wants to make a body suit out of me
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