I'm at a Mexican Walmart. Wish you were here.
It's an Italian thing I guess, grew up on that shit.
I'm Irish, we don't eat cow guts unless they're blended into a fine whiskey
'in an unhealthy relationship' should def be an fb option
Just made my alarm the Lion King song. Too excited about waking up to sleep.
Exactly. wat kind of friend would i be if i even pretended to give a shit about ur problems
Well, I didn't bring a notebook or any paper to class. Should I take notes on the sugar packet, lace thong, or condom wrapper that instead are in my school bag?
Just told my mom sparks is a health drink. Officially getting hammered on the way to the beach.
i was beyond wasted so he tucked me into bed and wrapped the blankets around me like a burrito. then gave me a bloody mary and an omlet when i woke up. and who says living with your cousin is a bad thing?!
His penis is small and he doesnt like Harry Potter. HE HAS NO REDEEMING QUALITIES WHAT AM I EVEN DOING HERE
There are people taking shots out of a turtle shell.
how do you casually eat pancakes with someone after they send you an unsolicited dick pic?
you don't. it's the point of no return for pancake enjoyment.
I think he's trying to finish jacking off before throwing up again
It has now been 10 days since we last saw Sebastians penis
I JUST SAW MY THERAPIST OUTSIDE OF WORK AND I DONT KNOW THE ADULT THING TO DO
Before making travel and hotel reservations to meet your "affair" for the first time, consult your menstrual calendar! $633 wasted!
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