I'm watching a Sinbad stand up special. Not even drugs can make this funny.
Its so hard looking at my mom and pretending I'm not dying a slow death of binge drinking
i had the all of mcdonalds chanting USA as he motorboated you
They showed a guy on tv in a Brady jersey and a sweatpants boner when the NE offense took the field. They didn't show his face. I hope that wasn't you.
Dude she pregamed for her sorority's philanthropy.
We're high and this subject came up and I'd like a female opinion: if you were a dude, what would you do if a girl tried to give you a foot job?
Calling a preemptive no homo on tonight's activities
I was like kind of drunk but mostly just very enthusiastic about beyonce
Is it wrong that I want to do a nude photo shoot with nothing but a light saber?
It was so small.
Tiny. Got to love sexting. Imagine finding out the old fashioned way.
I'm literally beginning to think that my sex dreams are prophesies
I don't know how a coffee date turned into road head. But hey
So... Sex in my rain boots last night. Trashy or a great show of character?
If it was with a guy, trashy. Sex with a girl is never trashy.
tell me about the eggs
Do not let Mike show you his naughty Santa Claus outfit. It's a super long beard and crotchless pants.
Randomize
