I got wasted for the 1st time and I sat in a fridge for 2 hours and a trash can?
i had a dream that i had so much marijuana that i didn't know what to do with it. i woke up and cried.
Good news.. I found out what I did Saturday night. Bad news... I found out what I did Saturday night.
My niece just unknowingly cock blocked me. Obviously, someone won't be getting a christmas present this year.
yeah, she started doing yoga and cocaine....looks good on her.
I still can't believe you had sex with someone who willingly went by Peaches.
I just had a threesome in the back of my mom's van. I'm pretty sure the rest of my week is going to be epic.
Can you please reassure him im not a scary or intimidating person? And that really my entire life is a series of completely ridiculous events that have led me here?
Saxophones in my mind. I swear someone dosed me.
not totally sure where im at but i think i've definitely woken up on this couch before. bong on the coffee table looks familiar. should be able to find my way home
WHAT KIND OF GUY JACKS OFF TO A PICTURE OF A BUTT WHAT IS THIS THE 1980s
I was too lazy to get my chapstick out of my purse so i lubed up my lips with pizza grease. On a scale of 1-10 how embarassed should i be?
He broke his arm in a fistfight with the bouncer. it was neat.
how the FUCK did i spend 25 dollars at 50 cent beer night?
You waddled all the way home with your shoes in a construction cone. I'm glad to call you my Bestfriend.
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