quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
Do you realize we just stole 12 dollars worth of quarters each from the office petty cash just to get manicures? New high or New Low?
he was going down on me when he saw the warts...nevertheless he told me he had to pick his sister up from school. why does this keep happening to me???
She fucking ripped my chandelier out of my ceiling. How does that make her a keeper?
WHY. COME BACK. TRAPPED WITH ROOMMATE AND FALCON. SAVE ME. I HAVE HUMMUS.
My bullwhip has saved my life tonight and gotten me laid. I'm gonna be Indiana Jones every Halloween!
He left npr on the whole time when we were doing it. ironic that i lost it on the 100th anniversary of the titanic. thanks michelle norris.
begin the sex magic rocket ship countdown
I sat on my couch last night watching What Women Want, eating ice cream, and sobbing "why doesn't she like me?" Why was I born a man?
Is it bad that when someone says the phrase "helicopter dick" I immediately think of you?
I just drank beer out of an old Vicodin bottle hoping to catch some residue. That's how finals week is going
I just used a gift card from my in-laws to buy their daughter a vibrator. What even are morals?
I feel like sleeping with foreign people is a long term investment. It's like a time share. Now when I go to London I have a place to stay.
Okay but look at his jawline. I NEED TO RIDE IT.
It's beautiful. It's what jesusxwants. I should send you a pic of my boobs out of friendship
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