Just got the test results back. All clean, Now whose an idiot for going bareback in South America for 3 months straight.
i dont know everytime i see her teeth i get erectile disfunction
he is allergic to cats. we can only glue dog hair on him. otherwise he might die and i dont want to be responsible for that.
ahaha ok
let's call it "werewolfing"
He kept calling my vagina a magic clam, and it was speaking to him, telling him to feed it his penis. I played along.
If I give you a key to my place you have to promise to one day wake me up with a blowjob.
And by one day I mean once every two weeks.
The boat wouldn't start, so we brought it back to her house and we've been sitting in it in her driveway for the past 5 hours drinking beer and yelling at peoplee.
I'm just so happy. I go to sleep and when I wake up there will be chocolate milk and penis.
That guy drinking savagely was actually at his buddy's gay bachelor party in the male stripper section. He came over to the chicks side so we drank with him.
He had some sort of penis-related post traumatic stress disorder, but body shots seemed to wake him up
I try new drugs instead of new boys. That way you can't scold me about the importance of condoms
I'm just gonna go with where the wind takes me. if it takes me to his dick, so be it.
He ate the contents of an ashtray and didn't puke, I think he can handle drinking a fifth to himself.
Only real friends lend their restraints to engagedfriends to fool around with married strangers.
His favorite positions involve choking me out. I'm marrying him.
Well I got black out drunk before the rehearsal dinner and berated my family with insults. But other then that it was a good time
dude, next time you say lets go on an adventure, tell me if there are going to be psychotrophics involved before hand.
Randomize
