Im rethinking drunk tuesdays. Also rethinking ovaries.
i love how he claims to not know english but when i ask him to come over and fuck me he's all of a sudden fluent
Ummmm yeah ..,.. All three girlfriends I have right now are chatting with each other at the party...... I'll see you on the other side
someone just sent me a bong wrapped in christmas paper in the mail. signed 'santa'.
Things we need. Powerade. Water in fridge. Mixers for vodka. And reality checks.
He told me to put on my big boy pants, then take them off and fuck her before he smacks me with a chair. His pep talks suck.
It took years to rebuild my brains forcefield against your charm and I feel like u seal team 6'd ur way in again and caught my common sense sleeping on post
I would fuck him In a heartbeat, an obese child running up stairs with an irregular heartbeat, heartbeat.
I have to stop letting him stay all weekend. I feel like a cored apple.
I woke up with chocolate melted between my tits. I'd say that's a win for all parties involved.
I mean. I just want to sit in my bed and eat bagels. What's wrong with that?
he appreciated my fucking vagina for two hours he can appreciate my honesty
Putting a bow on your dick doesn't make it a real present
I wanna suck that fisherman's dick.
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
Randomize
