I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
This random guy asked me if I had downs. I was like up yours! And I got out of his car.
I'm drinking ghetto ass mojitos!
Wow. How can mojitos be ghetto?
Squirt + bacardi limon + limes = ghetto mojitos
ok this is the part where i go up stairs and pass out incoherently untill 6 30 tommaorw morning and not rember any of this. love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!
I got laid because I told her I play guitar. I haven't played in 7 years and only know a G chord. I love this place.
it was like watching bambi learning to walk, if bambi was 22 and a high functioning alcoholic.
Where is my rescue team. I keep hiding shit. And I'm trying to give out shots of olive oil
don't mind me. just hanging out in this cool air conditioned Babies R Us until the liquor store next door opens.
Any time you can't remember a night, and you wake up in a sorority house, it's fucking worth it.
Is it bad that I feel proud to be the first one to puke in the apartment? And I did it in style?
You straight up painted the counter with steak, tequila and beer. You owe me a knew toothbrush.
i really need to shower, but i don't want to take off my bra and lose my cleavage. the struggle
See, this is why we give you shit. Ashley gets her car cleaned out, I get multiple enchiladas made, and you get cum in your eye.
i wasnt sure i had a crush on her until i woke up this morning and saw i had googled fifteen variations of "lesbian marriage in estonia". where the fuck is estonia
In fairness you've introduced me to a lot of people I've only met once, for like 5 seconds, while drunk
Idk what's happening right now but im wearing a tutu and pissed as fuck.
Randomize
