it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
My main thought on the Olympics: I need LESS cowbell.
I popped a zit on your vagina. Don't say I never loved you.
its my first week of college and i have a UTI
not easy being a whore now is it
Dipping doritos in ranch. Why doesn't he love me?
he couldnt get it up, so i stole his lighter. i needed to have some reason to say the night wasnt wasted
I'm gonna go drown myself in the shower. Make sure to cover me up before the paramedics arrive. I'm too fat to be seen naked right now.
When I get home we should play "let's see how many Christmas movies we can watch before we start having sex."
I found my hair extensions. They were in my hamper.
I ended up in bed with a man from London in a sorority wing I am not apart of. Tequila fucks you up
Our host-mom was rubbing her back sympathetically going "muy bien, chica" while she puked on the beach. So yeah, I think we got the best one.
I just had to close my blinds so my neighbors wouldn't see me drinking a beer at 9 am. GO CHIEFS!
We discussed how many times we've passed out during sex. The answers may shock you.
All im saying is that my face might fall off.
My niece I'm babysitting left earlier to stay the night with her friend. I got ditched by an 8 year old.
Randomize
