so we were having anal, both very very drunk when he started shouting his roomates name
my facebook is like a giant collection of my one night stands
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
ive come to the point where weve hung out more times sober than drunk. i think im growing up. fuck.
we sixty- nined on a tennis court.. not even drunk. you say insane. i say creative genius.
Sorry for trying to force you and Robert to make out. I didn't realize how awkward it was until I woke up today.
It was about the point the universe collapsed in on itself and I was a singularity of insanity that I realized I was tripping balls.
Yup. We're now banned from TWO of our nation's finest zoos.
Dear god. Please. Please do NOT deprive yourself of dick for 90 days. Blood will spill. Wolverines will howl. I can't handle that kind of terror.
If there was a tv show called "True Life: My 58 Year Old Dad Rolls Better J's Than Me" I'd be on it.
I swear to fucking god if he takes away netflix I will have no problem sending his gf our sex videos
I probably shouldn't be taking relationship advice from my side piece...
MY HAND WILL BE UP HIS ASS IF HE DOES NOT APOLOGIZE FOR WHAT HE DID. IT WON'T BE THE GOOD-FEELING KIND OF "HAND-UP-ASS" EITHER.
roommates are droppin acid, i really should stop them from staring directly at the light bulb, but their giggles are so enchanting.
You planned on giving him head in the shower?
More like I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
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