Joe is yelling at the trees again.
Nothing says "I love you" like a full raw dog.
Now would be a great time to stop wondering " Who let the dogs out" and go to sleep
you refused to come out of the bathroom until i asked you in spanish
white trash bash was a total success...cops shut it down twice and her hair stayed in rollers all night..she never broke character
And i generally try not to roofie people when I'm in a committed relationship.
Can you deep fry cheerios do you know? crucial question
Well someone has to be the Christmas slut at the family dinner. I suppose it's my year to fill those shoes.
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
Still want to know how you got back last night? Two Campus Security Officers carried you in around 430. Your pants were around your ankles.
I hate Sailor Jerry.
Is it bad that I've been making new friends through your vagina networking? I don't think so
Whelp, I woke up on the front lawn this morning. I have got to stop wearing these underwear. Every time I do, I end up puking in someone's greenery.
Waking up drunk is great, waking up drunk and hanging with your mom is even better.
I literally heard an 'oh my god' when the shirtless Tongan appeared.
seriously i don't trust him. he fed me a hot dog out of a crock pot and gave me moonshine dashed jager bombs.
Randomize
