Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
Not only did I hold your hair back as you puked, i french braided it. I am such a great friend.
on my arm i have a score card from when we apparently had a competition to see who could harden his nipples fastest..
who won?
THAT is your concern right now?
my dad just referred to me and my boobs as 'the three of you'
Yeah i knew he wasn't okay when he told me he was "seeing his vision"
I just found a babydoll head in my sink where we ripped it off and did shots out of it.
Can you confirm that Victor fucked a girl for Jack in the Box tacos?
I cannot, but I know he fucked a girl for a Nerf hoop and a "Kingpin" dvd.
Fell asleep in the library, woke up because I almost let out a sleep fart. That was close.
First sunburned tits of the season. And it's only April... I feel like it's going to be a good summer.
I'm trying to get fucked by 4 girls here, and you're worried about verb tenses?!
Being able to fart in her presence and not be judged is why I pay half the rent.
I'm finally in my bed, my pants are off, and there's no pee on my carpet this is the best life has been all day
I bet you there is porn for people who get off on someone rubbing Chipotle on themselves
he said he couldn't believe he just lost his virginity and passed out. what have i done
Just because I know you’ll get a kick out of this, I sneezed earlier and cupcake frosting came out
Randomize
