They refer to his house as "the abortion clinic". Cant wait.
You were throwing ham at people telling them you were the sandwhich fairy
Sorry if I put you in that 'glad we're hanging out but I'm gonna go fuck your cousin' kind of position
She asked the taxi driver to stop at the Texaco because she had to puke. She did then stumbled into the gas station and bought a 40.
Everything is fine now . The coast guard said we just can't take the inflatable trampling out past the break way anymore
she gave me head while wearing a sombrero and told me it was her "welcome to south of the border" blowjob. i am never leaving mexico.
The only thing I regret was that he was wearing a scarf when we made out.
It was like inception, a dream, in a dream, in the back of a dodge charger.
I totally straight up jacked your pants. I am so sorry.
Can we relax the "married man" rule just once?
Too bad, iambic pentameter is a drunk specialty of mine.
Is it too forward if I ask him to bring a condom when he comes over to work on our project?
Anytime you wish.we are doing double shots in the kitchen,and I drank a beer in the shower,so...the sooner you get here,the sooner you can get on our level.
Saddle up bitches, we're going to an orgy.
Adulthood is putting your bongs in the dishwasher because you're too lazy to clean them manually.
Are you ok dude?
Randomize
