There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
I might be drunk enough to make out with you. You don't want to miss this unique opportunity.
I think i really like him...he was super cuddly and kept me company.
stop. you already have a dog
I'm sitting next to this guy at the bar. I wrote him a little song in my head it goes "there is no fucking chance you're getting in my pants" gonna sing it to him after he buys me another drink.
I hope you shit your pants in a socially devastating situation.
One person in the car. Three blizzards. Alot of judging.
raced the clock twice to day to see if i could get off before my computer died and before i left for my noon bar crawl... win, win
lets go back to having secrets in our friendship
took adderall before wrapping presents, ended up making paper snowflakes for two hours
Due to the events of st patties day last year I created a moral and ethical policy so that I won't get kicked out of the bar again. It mostly consists of not wearing pants so then I don't take them off at the bar.. and subsequently get kicked out.
seis de mayo is my least favoite holiday because i usually spend it in bed sobbing over my poor life decisions from the night before.
Well, I just did coke with a drag queen in a bathroom so that's the direction this night is taking
Every single item that was in my fridge is now in my hot tub. Please help
who has a one night stand on Christmas ? But he's pretty attractive so thumbs up
I wish there was an emoji for sad lady boners
I am dancing alone in my bathroom because I was paranoid the neighbors were watching through the windows
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