someone get that fucking seahorse.
By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
she smelled like a LAN party
I accidentally requested the ides of march off instead of st patricks day. Is this an omen? will alcohol be my brutus?
i didnt mean to paint the dog... it just kinda happened
You were too busy being proud of your penis shaped pancakes to notice...
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
First lesson of the year: don't close the bar on mondays
I've already started drinking so the earlier you get out of class the more coherent I'll probably be.
Idk we were snorting lines and making out in the stall while these people were cheering us on, on the other side. And that's when I realized he wasn't the only guy in the girls bathroom.
you are going to have to live with the consequences, i'm going to fuck your sister
In other news, someone I've had sex with won jeopardy last night.
We'll wreck the fuck out of my furniture. How often does one really get the chance to fuck through a table with no negative consequences?
Sometimes I'm sad but then I realize that bagels.
can we take a moment to remember my theory on 'your tongue is a snake that lives in your mouth' because we reached a whole new level of high
Randomize
