Oh my god he is having a sentimental moment right now.
He just sent me like a really heartfelt confession of love in which he ended with "make the apt, I'll hold your hand while you get your clit pierced."
please quote me on this- the only thing worse than being ugly is being ugly and thinking that you're pretty
You asked me to be the big spoon, when you passed out on the stairs
just tried to pee in the sink at wendys...need to stop letting my drunk habits get into my sober life
So a sorority girl just introduced herself to me by saying "a guy I used to fuck just threw up on me" and then she grinded on me
I miss living with her. She was the only person who was a bigger train wreck than I am.
She's drunk as hell locked up I. The bathroom with my shoes where do I go from here
As sure as my left ball is bigger then my right. We will have our moment.
So this is what you do on your hungover days off put your balls into an egg carton?
I'll pay you to write the paper but not for sex. You should only get paid for something you work hard at.
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
You strapped the bucket of KFC into the carseat and refused to let me drive over 20 miles per hour the whole ride home. That high.
You're worse than that girl who made out with her cousin at that party
That was you...
if Anne Taylor knew what she did in her clothes, she'd be banned from the store.
oh come on, it's the perfect length summer dress to blow a stranger in the bathroom in
he's a firefighter. like being a firefighter screams MY DICK IS HUGE SO I'M NOT AFRAID TO DIE IN THIS FIRE.
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