He famously once noted that women should wear white "like all other domestic appliances,"
he got up in front of the whole lecture hall and yelled that Charlie Brown's Christmas tree was his favorite book in the history of the universe. then he stumbled out the fire exit setting the alarm off. I could've jumped him right then and there.
Yah, I definitely wouldn't wanna be fingered with a fake arm...
My vagina has become a graveyard for my brother's friendships...
Today's dinner table topic: the probablity of my dad turning gay if he ever left my mom.
u r missing out we r watching a tranny direct traffic in a gstring
After she lost the bet I made her get on one knee so she could "Te-blow me"
I think drinking everclear was a better idea than taking a night class.
You'd think the neighbors would be used to grown men coming into my house drunk at 230 am.
I woke up this morning with a tampon in my nose and food EVERYWHERE...
The pee I just pissed was about 7% better than the one at your house. But both are pretty far up there.
They're letting me in by good graces, I can't show up with a fist full of dildos
Like I thought me shitting my pants was bad today... Then the election happened.
I just watched my mom pour beer into her vodka and drink it.
Quit being awkward towards me every time the group is together. They're going to figure out we're fucking.
Randomize