Blew in her face. She is Pissed. Yahtzee. As she brushes her teeth.
I cant help but queef when the male extremity enters
What is a male extremity?
i didnt realize it was that long since you've had sex
It's an open bar on a yacht... I'm going to drown.
There're making snowcones with the leftover vodka from last night. This is not the time to be making up excuses!
It looks like the misc $300 credit card fraud might have been our taxi cab driver who wouldn't take boobs as payment. No wonder...
I don't think he knows what shame means anymore. He gave some bar slut his sisters Tiffanys necklace, in exchange for anal.
You can drink as much as you want but it's not gunna make her forehead any smaller
I was hoping it might at least fix her teeth
she was braiding my hair and singing forever young while she vommed everywhere at the same time. Talent.
You know what would make the espn body photos even better? If anyone knew who any of those fucking athletes were. That, and maybe not feature Gary Player.
I just drove my booty call to his booty call, if that isn't spreading the love, I don't know what is.
Also, totally got laid in my yellow rubber boots and it was awesome.
maybe one of us should just pity fuck him and get it over with.
Well, after a pitcher of beer, I set my ex on fire. It was a little fire, he's fine. How's your night?
I tried to cut you?! I'm sorry! PS where's my hair?
Bring shot glasses to the final. Don't ask questions.
Randomize
