Yeah i'm definitely friends with drunk kyle, not sober kyle.
Yeah, my mom walked in on us. Instead of yelling, she went and hid in the bathroom til we finished. It was pretty classy.
I don't know how much more of summer my liver can take.
My 10 year old son gave me a bottle of jameson for fathers day. Did you have something to do with this?
I found bruises on my neck from barfing out the window.
Cops said there's a crazy dude with a mask in my neighborhood. Don't get stabbed.
If he was naked that was me.
If youre wondering about the smell, i set your hamster on fire. But don't worry he's ok
I told my mom I'm great in bed. That is quality mother daughter bonding.
He started a convo with me by saying that we went to high school together and then recommended I try meth.
i don't find him as attractive when he's dressed as himself...bring back Indiana jones and I would so fuck him again
lets face it, we have a liquor cabinet with a designated chocolate shelf
I’m a go ahead and fuck down ATL. So when I leave in January I’ll have no regrets.
Dude I may be rolling but there's no way I can make up a 12 ft tall giant green man waving to me right now
False alarm, security just told me it's a radio tower
Ugh hungover at a laundromat is a terrible feeling. For some reason I keep getting sucked into staring at the clothes spinning around and around and it makes me want to profusely projectile vomit everywhere
His dog hid my thong. Let me tell you, the last thing you want during a commando mini skirt walk of shame is lots of wind. There’s a church congregation that knows all my business
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