oh god the rape fog is back!
Do you think this abandoned cigarette has herpes? cuz I'm tempted.
I think I'd rather ejaculate tabasco. You'd have to scrape out guacamole.
i sold my breathalizer so i could buy weed
She sang Bad Romance to me. Not really the answer I was looking for.
hey just checking if u still hate me for sleeping with your sister?
Why is your signature on my underwear?
I wish you would just come have sex with me in ihop. I don't want to be here
You drink it until you puke in a vent one time and it's ruined forever.
Well I was thinking of taking him out for drinks then lecturing him about his drinking... kind of like an open minded intervention
Lemme put it this way babe, at point you were naked in Target.
Where were you?
Laughing
Just keep me informed about your plans. That way i can figure out places to go and if i need to shave my balls
Just deepthroated a hot dog. Thinking of you
like sometimes I wish I was allergic to latex so I wouldn't have sex with so many people..
RICK FUCKING MORANIS!!!!!
Randomize
