that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
there's something so ridiculous to me about watching someone with glasses exercising. it's like watching a whore studying in the library. stop trying to be someone you're not.
He freaked out when I started to orgasm. He said he never knew girls could orgasm too.
Youre on making sure I dont black out around fat chicks duty
I'm on strict orders from her to keep sleeping with you until you give her a job next summer.
Just caught my first cougar this fake was worth every fucking penny.
I think if it were a part of everyone's daily routine, the world would be happier. International Finger Yourself While Bathing Day.
whose parrot is this?
THEY SELL PREFROZEN MARGARITAS AND THEY COME WTH A STRAW. MY PRIORITIES ARE IN ORDER
I told you being able to play expert on guitar hero would get us laid one day
I want to die, ON THAT, with that INSIDE ME. ironically, I sense that would be the only time I'd feel alive.
He asked if I had any questions. Apparently, "how thick is the stick up your ass" was not a correct question.
Things could not have gone more poorly if I had stripped naked and run through the Sahara with sirloins tied to my vagina.
just realized I'll be in a check out line with just Hershey syrup and condoms. I don't know if I am setting a good image for our generation
I know you’re not my dad, but you’re someone’s dad. You’re also like a second dad to me as well. And one who I send nudes to as well. Happy Father’s Day
Randomize
