ok now this is the second time he's reffered to recieving a blow job as 'getting his pee pee sucked'
her dad is making me watch Glen Beck, i only agreed because i penetrated his daughter earlier.
I have decided to cut my hair. This is based solely on the fact there is too much of it to clean vomit out every Sunday afternoon.
He blow dried my hair while I sucked his dick. Now THAT'S fucking teamwork.
Best part? I know that the likelyhood of this turning into an intimate relationship is like 4.25%
begin the sex magic rocket ship countdown
she's a drunken disney princess. so basically me if i had a crown and no desire for independence.
All of my friends are hooking up and here I am, the lone asexual, looking for someone to eat these tostitos with me.
I had sex with a mask on because I have the flu and I didn't want to get him sick.
I'm sorry about the spring break comment. I won't make anymore pornos, I promise.
I'm good. But Nutella doesn't taste as good as it used to.
How's work going?
Boring. I have a cat on a leash right now
....even the bartender was embarrassed for her
By the way, you're like fucking spiderman. I've never seen someone climb out of a car window that fast and eloquently.
I’m getting back at my ex and training my new boy toy how to properly satisfy a woman. I’m killing two birds with one dick.
Randomize
