Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
he just booty called me in advance instead of waiting til 3 am when hes trashed. i think thats really considerate and gentlemanlike.
so its official, girls can see a boner through my snuggie.
Also...you were trying to touch his balls without him noticing
After having to meet his mom half naked, running into the tree in front of her didn't seem so bad.
Just talked to Kate. She said I called her on Friday night. She said I was crying for 5 minutes because we were parked in front of a fire hydrant.
Hey it happens. Think of it this way- you didn't wake up in jail, your face wasn't inexplicably busted and you still have all your teeth. In this group of friends, you're on top!
After 3 dates I think I'm failing at painting the "sweet guy with a future" picture and more painting the "this is the guy to call when you've run out of options and want to get fucked in half drunk to forget about it" picture.
The nausea has returned and I can't handle such things to exit my body so violently
Yeah, my new jeep also came with custom license plates that read 4SKIIN. Not "4 skin" but "4 skiing" thanks mom and dad
My brother didnt wanna sleep with her because she was my friend. Did I miss the memo where we're not supposed to be fucking each others friends? Oh well too late.
Would you still love me if my nipple fell off?
Besides, I'm booked tomorrow. I'm planning on drinking heavily and crying in the bath.
I think I met my butt stuff soulmate
i have two papers due tomorrow. contemplating if i should take adderall in my anus for full effects
Randomize
