the last time I saw her she was leaving the mens bathroom and club rush with her dress inside out. typical tease.
dude, your ex-bf is on match.com
details on that.
well, his profile doesn't say anything about herpes.
Todays outfit involves shorts with embroidered fish. This kids gonna die.
Here's my recipe for happiness. Go get a pen. 1. smoke a bowl 2. put on explosions in the sky 3. take a bath. Do this for about 1 hour or until all your problems go away.
all we did was drink wine and talk about how people who dont have facebook dont exist.
So not only just find my adoption papers that I didnt know about in my parents house, but they say "child shows some signs of mental retardation".
she just uttered the sweetest sentence in the english language...my stripper friends are coming over
there comes a time in a mans life when you ask yourself, will i fake love for blowjobs? and the answer is always yes
If a "boob" guy and an "ass" guy are discussing which you are better qualified for....just let them
I walked around with red solo cups on my feet, weeds tied around my neck and a tree in my hand
I'll be thirty in eight months. I think my goal is too stop changing my pants in the parking lot at work by then.
hell no. i was not wasting my two tears of virginity on him.
Something I can get at drive through, boobs out, don't want to get out of the car
Well now you know not to take drugs from your friends. Take it from stangers. They're more reliable.
I've turned into a small time drug dealer, now who's the real MVP.
Randomize
