Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
the pub in dfw airport has a countdown timer to st. pattys day, to the second, i like texas
it glows. i had to have it.
Just want you to know I am def drunk enough to burn down your house. Don't worry I checked the stove like 6 times. I love grilled cheese
I fed the cats at 7 am, made her eggs, gave her oral, and now I'm helping her clean and baking her brownies. Cosmos got nothing on me.
It finally happened. My conscience stopped working. I've never felt so free
in my lab write-up should i mention that i watered my plant with tequila?
Had no idea what his name was when I woke up. Went through his desk, found his tax records. Ben. And loaded.
She wanted to make popcorn, but the air-popper was broken. So she dumped the entire container of kernels into the clothes dryer. Drunk movie night was a success!
feelin groggy baby? need a coffee? vitamins? a nice good fuck on the piano?
As soon as he came we went to Dairy Queen. That drive through lady was very condescending about our "just fucked" ice cream.
Thank you for the legal advice. I hope I can pay you in blow jobs.
By the power invested in me i promise you hot wedding sex at my wedding.
I never said it was inaccurate, I said I hate you.
This bitch goes out driving during the nor'easter to get her ass eaten.. that’s dedication
Randomize
