i gave her road head last night, needless to say it wasn't the same and i bit a chunk of the inside of my cheek off.
It was everywhere, it looked like he just took the leftovers and threw them around the bathroom... Festively...
$1 margaritas. This happy hour needs to end.
There's some muscle relaxers in my bedside table. Sorry if my dildo is in the bathroom.
Holy fuck, spaghetti burritos are the best idea I've ever had.
This summer isn't about fun. We have to train our livers to survive the next four years.
I made the jerking off hand motion to my mother by accident this morning. It was awkward for everyone involved.
WHO THE FUCK TAGS THEMSELVES AT COUNTY JAIL?!?!
I went from naked with lasts nights hookup to Ihop in 6 minutes flat
I think that's a new house record
my roommate would be appalled if she knew how many times i've peed in the kitchen sink
That's brilliant but could get us arrested. Give me shots until I shout LET'S DO THIS
She acted like falling "up" the stairs was a fucking physics phenomenon. I call that Tuesday nights.
Idk I saw a cheetah print onesie and it reminded me of your Lion King fantasy.
Are you still in his room?
Nope, yogged home at 8 am with one shoe on.
I feel like you're encouraging me to commit a felony.
I feel like you're wasting time.
Randomize
