oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
she has over 3,000 tagged photos on facebook. dont tell me she isnt annoying.
no one should ever give us hovercrafts
I'm on the strip, it's like a mini new years eve. Some girl just got taken away on a stretcher with her meter margarita in her hand claiming it's trophy for being awesome. Damn tourists are lightweights.
he's werid. hell kiss me after i go down on him but he wont kiss me after i eat anything with mustard.
Do you not remember you showing everyone in the bathroom your period stained underwear? I'd say you were pretty happy it came
I'm gonna go out in a limb and say living out middle school fantasies is never a good idea
I've started grabbing my boobs in front of my lesbian philosophy professor so she'll give me a better grade. It's working...
I feel like I was just dunked in a tub of beer and then thrown in a giant dryer with rocks in it.
Just a heads up before you get home. Took the shelves out of the fridge so i could fit the beer ball and bucket of riot punch. Apparently i decided the stove was the best place to keep them. They got cooked when we pre heated to cook a bird we shot. This may be the final straw for our security deposit
Hey... Tell me if you remember differently, but nobody truly saw me naked, right?
And you were like wow I love water shots they taste so good
TELL HER ABOUT THE GODDAMNED MOTHERFUCKING POTATOES
I think I just found my soul mate...he's wearing a zebra striped onesie and is into Michael Jackson...I'll explain in the morning.
I was just told that I'm the Sherlock Holmes of drunken sex. I'll take it.
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