First thing she said after sex was.. are you baptised by chance?
come over anyways, right now, right this second
it can be a super quick quicky, then you can go back to studying
wow, that sounds SO fun, please stop enticing me with premature ejaculation
Am i fat?
Well i wouldnt let you on top
I always forget that visiting my hometown is like a who's who of ugly people.
Go forth Daniel, drink, be merry... And meet some hot Asians for your friends to bang
I actually bought food at McDonald's as an apology for what I was about to do to their bathroom.
i wasnt laughing because you were puking, i was laughing because three yards away there was a couple seriously getting it on
continuing my moment killer tradition in the best possible way
Being able to fart in my own house is like 90% of why I pay rent
Get his dick out of your ass and put on some pants we're here
It's shark week go big or go home
For a girl who cried from fear the last time she was asked out, this. Is. TERRIFYING!
Wait, but now I'm curious. In what position were y'all when the cops came? Were you guys butt ass naked in the car? 😂😂
Just a little drinking. So much fun and love. The world is a shiny wonderful sphere in the sky so why shouldn't we celebrate?
That is our entire relationship. We match bowls and give each other head. What more could you possibly want?
So naked ping pong was a mistake... Looks like we were attacked by an octopus.
Randomize
