i just made out with my boyfriends father...and so did jess
scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
Just found 50 pesos and a coke spoon in my dads old shit. Gotta love the 70s
Can someone please explain to me how I got rugburn on my tits?
u know what's depressing? a picture of an owl without a graduation cap
For some reason, my father is not responding to the 5 texts I sent him that all read: "Dad dad dad dad dad dddaadd dddddaaaaaaaaad dad".
I really wish you were half the slut you're sister was in college
Judging by her face, I'd say she's at least dabbled with meth...
its friday night, im aone in my apartment and eating 2 year expired canned fruit, naked. i'm not single or anything..
Whatever, the fact of the matter is that I saved you from poorly planned outdoor sex by doing a rain dance and you should totally thank me.
Right... Let's keep my vodka tinged mind focused on simple words
Apparently she "missed me" and the only logical solution was to fuck my brother.
Yeah just pls explain the dishes and the dildo. I don't want to lose my job over a dick in the cooler.
Yeah, but having a dick this size has ruined 3 marriages.
Yo did you say we are blacking out saturday night and playing dodgeball?
Yeah for relay for life. Its for cancer
Randomize
