so i was just informed that i sang that song "pop that pussy ayyy pop that pussy" at the halloween party saturday. iembarrassing.
i'm so high that for the last 10 minutes i pretened my sock was a mouse, and played with it like it was legit.
I used the word aforementioned in my paper. That's an automatic A in community college.
Just got roadhead in a driving snowstorm. That shit should be a Winter X games event.
Katy Perry is on a Proactiv commercial. That "I kissed a girl" shit is so much less hot now.
Hippo gnu deer
Whatever. It was high school. Back then I'd blow anyone who had enough room between their chest and their steering wheel for my head to fit.
Im rolling a blunt of encouragement for you to return to
He stopped in the middle of us having sex and asked "is today Monday?" then went even faster
So scratching an ex marines beard, telling him "nice hairy pussy." then when he opens his mouth to respond, I started fingering his mouth. Needless to say was a horrible idea
I will have you again some day my love. And our divorce will be magnificent
I can smell the sangria seeping out of my pores
I found Erin. She's getting a back massage from the coat check boy and drinking all his whiskey.
Dreamt I had my own personal vibrator rep, who made house calls. I earned an upgrade to an electric model, since I was burning through batteries. That's it. Time for a bf.
I’m excited to finally meet my stalkee and his penis!
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