His vagina is bleeding blood all over the court
Three questions. How does a tomato drive a car, how does an asparagus play a guitar, and how am I still so high that I chose to watch Veggie Tales?
this is no time to have dignity 4/20 is coming
Contrary to what peaches says, you can't fuck the pain away. Full story later. Have a good morning, buddy.
Well you broke that rule when you put it in your mouth.
i need to find a notary that isn't going to turn me in for blatantly lying to the us and chilean governments
He made off the wall shots in beer pong, stuck the girls dog in a cooler, and played with swords with her mom. I wish I got his name
no you're not allowed back
come on. everbeers was a great idea. you fucks had a great night
There are eight sets of guys I've made out with who have the same name. It's like noah's ark in my mouth.
I'll get you through man, I'll be your fairy godmother with better prescription drugs
I'm usually good at keeping a straight face, but not while singing a ballad to a stranger in a bathroom.
I smell like playdoh, sex, and ruined lives. I love the weekend
Worst wingman u don't do ANYTHING but laugh at my incompitant shyness
There is a couple fucking in the outback bathroom and at first I thought it was sick but than I remembered my Outback fantasy with you and decided I can't pass judgements.
My cats name is now jello shot. How much do you love me right now?
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