420 ftw
Sometimes I wonder if we could be friends if we lived closer.
And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
Yeah. My legs are trembling...hard to walk. Feels like a neon arrow is pointing at me saying "just had sex (with not his wife)"
He has jerked off in so many socks I am surprised he doesn't have athletes dick
conquered wheelchair sex. it's rather convenient. you'd think it was made for it, with all those handles and adjustable features.
I am never going on a blind date ever again. He drank way too much and kept telling me I had a nice boob. Like.. Singular. What's the other one? The ugly twin?
He asked us to wake him up with a strobe light. We had it going in front of his face full power for half and hour and he didn't even blink.
You know what the worst feeling in the world is? Sitting in your 6pm AA meeting still hungover from the night before
I can't believe I came last night staring into my profile pictures eyes.
I need to see you idiots before I go back to school. But we shouldn't snort Crown Royal this time.
Ok so I'm not gonna ignore the fact that you had sex on a frat basement floor and spent the last 4 years wondering how you got HPV
So I heard her yell at him and I went downstairs to find he had lit up each one of my smokes and taken just one drag off each and had em lined up on the table. She says he "experiments" when on Ambien.
I would totally suck a dick for some poutine right now
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