Blackout barefoot maybe pregnant
Good decisions....
Just got blue box Mac and cheese things are looking up
Currently listening to 'Just Put it in Your Mouth.' remember when i went through that phase?
update. expensive tequila only makes the mistakes more expensive.
Those people having sex on the beach kept looking over at you guys throwing his shoes at the seagulls.
BURNT NIPPLES ARE UNHAPPY NIPPLES.
Is cat milk safe for human consumption?
Ugh. Lets go crawl into a dairy-gluten-chlamydia free hole somewheres.
Someone came into our hotel room and took our remote
What should I do?
Oh, and let me go get some popcorn, watching you make your own decisions should be quite the shitshow.
I tried to help you up but you said "let me dance it off"
Haha. I found pics last week of me getting motorboated by a girl while i was taking a shot. Hahaha in my wedding dress. Classy
Do you remember vividly describing the shape and girth of my cock to that girl last night?
I just bought two cartons of ice cream, 5 boxes of mac and cheese and a bridal magazine. Don't judge me.
In this house, we have but one simple rule: DONT FUCKIN TOUCH MY STUFF OR I'LL CUT YOUR NECK IN UR SLEEP
And then I woke you by humping you to Lionel Ritchie.
Randomize
