Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
my dad just told me that a lesbian kissed my mom at a bar last year
We couldn't find any ping pong balls, so we used a fishing bobber. Could we be more country?
He wanted a handjob during a John Wayne movie. I just couldn't find it in my heart to disrespect that man. John Wayne that is.
You filled up my voicemail with a slurred but graphic depiction of how you were humping a fire hydrant.
thank you for tagging me in all my pictures as "skank" and yourself as "made by the hands of God"
I can'nr wwn explain this nihght . So amnt dixks. Shitttttt.
She tried to escape and she fell and hit the door. She's gunna freak when she wakes up with only half a tooth.
well, I yelled "the tribe has spoken!" at a boatload of people and then I walked home alone in the pouring rain at 1:30am. karma really is a bitch, yo.
drunk freshman in the bathroom puking keeps saying "i'm a peasant" over and over
My backyard is filled with beer cans. You idiots turned our backyard into a redneck ball-pit
I'm now using my vagina for good, not evil. Trying to restore balance to the force.
i believe in u and ur pee
kick those bitches in the teeth and tell them mama came to party
I just licked honey off my own tit. Is there anything about that which doesn't SCREAM single???
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