So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
whats up tonight?
Ice cream, wine, and teabags... Not the earl grey kind
Yeah, my mom walked in on us. Instead of yelling, she went and hid in the bathroom til we finished. It was pretty classy.
How do you have time to get laid so much in law school?
I like to set goals for myself. for example, he was my first libertarian
I just got turned down by a drunk fat chick. At my own birthday party. God hates me.
It's gotten to the point that the dirty talk in my head when I touch myself has your accent
All these girls I talk to are like I've never had a hangover and I'm like you don't drink right here let me show you
Would it be a good deed to leave a 32 pack of bud light next to a bum sleeping in the park?
I fail to see the problem of enjoying a glass of wine while I poop...
the point I'm tryimg to make is that you didn't need to take the whole box in with you
Wanna get really high and go on a Valentine's Day Sexathon cause we're both single or would that be weird?
Wait, just ask him if can you can join in. You haven't lived until you've taken part in a threesome with your father...or so I've heard
I just made a drug deal 100% through snap chat
I'm sorry that running around town like a frenetic wombat trying to find you KY jelly isn't good enough for you.
I have an interview tomorrow! The couple we regularly swing with said I could use them as references. Winning
you're now officially the 3000 mile booty call. congrats.
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