we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
I incognito puked under the VIP table. Did Jersey proud.
there is a strobe light in my taxi. in what way is this safe.
He gets a blow job; I get my oil changed free of charge. And that way I only see him every 2500 miles.
you're being fucking weird and i don't like it. text me when you're not being the after picture on a poster for rehab
Well pretty sure I lost 3 of my best friends in one week. Remember when I said I wasn't sure if I was gonna be a better person or a more despicable one in 2012. Despicable wins.
If my penis could make facial expressions, it would constantly have a smile on.
Like, she can be the shepard of the gays. Delivering him unto homosexuality.
Well after we were arrested you just kept chanting "Like a good neighbor state farm is there"
I know it's anime porn but I promise you the guy looks like Fred Durst
What happens if you die with an erection? Does it stay hard? Disclaimer: I'm high.
Can now check off "Start bar fight with my dad." on my bucket list.
You said "I feel like a koala bear. Do you ever just feel like a koala bear?" This is your brain on drugs.
I'm eating chicken wings naked and hungover at 10am... Happy bday to me
I'm not saying it wasn't great. I'm just saying sleeping with a gassy, depressed,45 year old mother was a different experience. Would do it again though.
Randomize
